I'm a fraud.
Everyday I wake up and pretend everything is fine, I lie to myself and everyone around me.
Every time I go out and run several miles in fancy running gear, I'm just a child playing dress-up hoping mommy won't catch me.
Every charity I volunteer for; every donation of my time is a falsehood wrapped around a very real personal need.
I'm not fine.
Everything I do; everything I throw myself into is a distraction from the truth.
I'm hiding.
I'm trembling.
I'm so scared of dying, I'm trying to live to the fullest... only to find my life is not my own.
I need a vacation from myself.
I need to heal.
Anna thank you for sharing your thoughts. Your last blog entry was over 2 months ago, how are you doing now?
ReplyDeleteI wish you the best, for better health, and a measure of peace.
Joe
Thanks for reading, and commenting. I appreciate it immensely.
ReplyDeleteSince I haven't had any new news to fret about recently, I haven't had much fodder to wax poetic about. In short, my health is steady, which has allowed me to pretend a little longer. I'm sure I'll be posting soon, after my upcoming MRI!
Anna I've got my fingers crossed that you'll get good MRI test results. I look forward to reading about it. here.
ReplyDeleteI just read an interesting story about Vivid Sydney 2013, and thought I'd share it with you. There's also a short, entertaining video that accompanies the story.
http://www.smh.com.au/entertainment/art-and-design/kraftwerk-kicks-off-vivid-sydney-with-a-display-for-the-senses-20130525-2n3ei.html
or google the phrase
Kraftwerk kicks off Vivid Sydney Morning Herald
Joe